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Ponderance : Your Brain & Willpower
Posted by Compubomb On Mar 24, 2007 @ 3:17 am | Visited ( 568 )
I swear, some times I wish I could alter my brain to do what I wanted. I know it in my heart that I
enjoy software and it's the place for me, but my brain tells me, I don't want to do that "right
now". I've written so many apps, I've dedicated a substantial amount of time learning, but I just
can't bring myself back to it. If your wondering what I'm talking about, there was a time when all I
did was live and breath php / web development, it's all I would / could talk about. In my pursuit to
learn more about php, I dove into linux / unix learning as much as I could. But today, generally
speaking, when I digress, believe the reason I learned so much is because I was severely depressed,
and thus put much of my energy into a hobby and learned as much about it at the time I could without
seeking the knowledge via books, but rather through a process of trial and error. I always told
myself that when I had the time, I'd eventually re-pursue the path and start working on more web
apps. I guess you could say that my passion for web development was primarily in content management
systems, which drove me to learn how to work with databases and SQL (Server Query Language).
Now that I have the time, I feel as though I'm looking for something to re-inspire, to
ignite and old passion to learn and get back into software. I wonder what type of person I was when
I was so focused and then it dawned on me that I was a pretty miserable person back then. Granted,
probably a more creative one, a more driven one, but an all out miserable person since all I thought
about was programming. As of late, my passion seems to be more so in politics, but I'm not good at
debate, nor do I come off as an outgoing / personable person. So, I guess only time will tell where
life leads me. There is one thing I do know, that that is my life will lead me to something IT /
technical in nature, and something that I'm passionate about.
Ponderance : A moment in time; An attempt at Introspection.
Posted by Compubomb On Apr 01, 2006 @ 5:11 am | Visited ( 194 )
Ever have one of those days where you were somewhat upbeat and then suddenly you decide to do
something 'upbeat', then suddenly once again, you lose that enthusiasm to do something useful ? I
swear, my entire life seems to be short periods of motivation with a gravitation pull to piss it all
away within moments of inspiration.
If you know of me or actually know me you
will have learned that I'm a computer science major. Thing about us software nerds is we have so
many moments of inspiration it's hard to figure out what we should pursue as a goal. I mean there
are so many things I could get into, but I just lack that essential inspiration to tackle
problems.
I guess a lot of it also comes down to my study ethic as well. I mean I
do fairly decent in school considering I got an 88/B+ on my last Calculus 2 exam, but I never put in
that 100% effort to anything. I always balance off this idea that I could always be doing something
else. Pragmaticizing the goal at hand, that inspirational moment of beauty, then smashing it with a
lead fist because I suddenly lose interest or focus.
If anyone actually will see
this, how have you attempted to overcome your pragmastizicing (is that even a word?). I don't know
if it is that I procrastinate, or pragmastizicing (I guess this word is invented as to say are you
being pragmatic about what your spending your time on). I guess when I think about why I do this, I
think of the old saying, don't work hard; think smart. So I’m always looking around trying
to think what is useful and what I should work on that won't cause me to give up 10 minutes after I
start.
Ponderance : Contemplation
Posted by Compubomb On Feb 10, 2005 @ 5:51 pm | Visited ( 367 )
I'm thinking about whether or not I shall move my site over to a system called drupal which is quite frankly far more powerful than my Content
Management System that I'm currently employing on my site; even though I do have a project in the
works, but who knows when I will actually attempt to work on it again. I have been getting pretty
bored online these days, but some cheering up is underway, supposedly, I'm going to be coming in to
possession of a new laptop -supposedly. Not only have I gotten rather board online, but I have
started to listen to more classical composition and modern composition primarily being Japanese
composers. Send me an instant message and I will be delighted to hook those who are willing to open
their minds up to some really good music.
Ponderance : Awesome Advice
Posted by Compubomb On Jan 05, 2005 @ 12:14 pm | Visited ( 281 )
This Article is so darn
inspirering. I must list this quote
The difference between a tolerable programmer
and a great programmer is not how many programming languages they know, and it's not whether they
prefer Python or Java. It's whether they can communicate their ideas. By persuading other people,
they get leverage. By writing clear comments and technical specs, they let other programmers
understand their code, which means other programmers can use and work with their code instead of
rewriting it. Absent this, their code is worthless. By writing clear technical documentation for end
users, they allow people to figure out what their code is supposed to do, which is the only way
those users can see the value in their code.
After reading that article, i felt
awesome about myself, especially since i've been complimented on my source for this cms on multiple
occations. Not only that, but i would like to think i have somewhat of an ability to communicate my
ideas to other people. Some, unfortunately, those being (you know who you are) the ones writing
software with 2 character variable names, you know who i'm talking about. Well, this article puts
you to shame :P
Ponderance : Not enough Time
Posted by Compubomb On Dec 22, 2004 @ 5:35 am | Visited ( 258 )
I was thinking about all this stuff i wanted to do before i got on x-mas break till the beginning of
my next semester and i feel completely hollow in the head. It is either my diet or i'm just not cut
out for the task, but i think a lot of it has to do with what i eat. They say, you are what you eat,
and that holds a lot of validity. I eat a lot of fatty foods, so i feel often very sluggish, not
very energetic, mentally lathargic, and have a hard time focusing. But then again, when you don't
have a lot of money, and your chicken sucks, you can't exactly cook up world class food, or maybe
i'm just bad at improvisation. Anywho, i'm working on an rss feed php5 script which i can hopefully
finish one of these days heh 
Ponderance : Stupid Holly Rollers
Posted by Compubomb On Nov 03, 2004 @ 11:44 am | Visited ( 251 )
Hell frozen over during this last election with John Kerry vs. G.W.Bush for president. I can't
believe what I saw on TV, John Kerry Conceded as being defeated. During this election G.W.Bush used
his "Born Again Christian" status to people to simply vote for him. I know I'm an American but for
crying out loud, this election was rigged. Were does Colorado get off changing the divvying up of
their electorates. Anyways, i have a large hatred for the ignorance of our evangelical conservatism
in this country, as i earlier pointed out to many of my friends "I've come to a conclusion that the
world is actually flat, and science and progression through society means nothing because god said
it ain't so. Matter of fact, all gays should be burned at the stake and crucified for disobeying
god" and in the eyes of these type of people all is right in the world. Well, for their information,
right now many of the victims of 911 are finally starting to get some action, they are having the
entire 911 case reinvestigated, even though our current president made a mockery of our own judicial
process. Something needs to be done!
Ponderance : Discovery Science Channel
Posted by Compubomb On Oct 13, 2004 @ 4:42 am | Visited ( 167 )
I just finished watching a whole series of shows on DSC all about the X-Prize. I was completely and
utterly amazed on how such a group could have ever accomplished such a task / goal. In the beginning
right from the start the primary designer of the space craft used unorthidox methodologies to test
the arrowdynamic stability of his space craft. If anyone has ever watched the history of the Wright
Brothers you will have also learned they also used unorthedox ideologies in testing out their final
results. All i can say is Job well done. Oh.. on a second note, if i don't major in computer science
i think i'll atleast have learn how to cook as a chef because boy do i love food
Ponderance : 2nd Debate
Posted by Compubomb On Oct 11, 2004 @ 1:06 pm | Visited ( 222 )
The other day I finished watching the debates between John F. Kerry & Bush Jr. and this lady
asked a question directed at Kerry as to how he would handle abortion laws. What really impressed me
is the fact that he is a religious person himself but he is not going to allow his own personal
believes to interfere with the constitutional right that all women are afforded to decide whether or
not they are going to terminate a pregnancy. To me this implies that Kerry is a very objective
individual compared to our so-called current president who reminds me more of a primate than a human
being.